Read at the funeral by nephew John Hawkins
We're all here today not just to say a sad farewell but also to celebrate the life of a lady who occupied a very special place in all our hearts.
Sheila was such a warm, welcoming person, so full of joie de vivre, so well-travelled and well informed, that time spent in her company was always a positive and uplifting experience.
We came away from visits to her home feeling buoyed up by the relaxed and convivial time we'd spent there - being regaled by her anecdotes, her views on current events and her genuine interest in all we had to say about our own family lives.
Sally has asked me to read the following tribute to her mother
Sheila was born in Rogerstone, Monmouthshire, on 16th July 1927, the first of two sisters. Her younger sister, Pat, arrived 18 months later.
Their parents, Herbert and Agnes Bethell, belonged to a family of market gardeners so as a girl Sheila had a healthy, outdoor life, and there were plenty of opportunities for fun activities such as apple scrumping with Pat and her friends.
Sheila attended Bassaleg Grammar School. near Newport, Wales. Her parents valued education and unlike many of her contemporaries she was lucky enough to stay on at school till she was 18.
Her first job was as a secretary in a local solicitor’s office.
In her spare time she loved to go out dancing with her friends. One evening a young man spotted her across the floor. He asked her to dance and then returned to his seat.
But Sheila decided he was rather nice so she went over to speak to him – perhaps a rather daring move for a lady in those far off days.
He told her he was spending four years in India with the RAF and had come home on short leave.
That was the first time Sheila and Roy met. He later told her he had spotted her as soon as he saw her walking onto the dance floor in her lovely red dress.
After that promising start they were soon separated because Roy had to return to India to continue his service.
The next time he saw her she was in the arms of not one but two other local boys. He was no doubt relieved to find that they were no threat to his romantic ambitions. They were just being gentlemen and carrying her home after she'd fallen and sprained her ankle.
Sheila and Roy were married on 8th March1948. Many happy times with family and friends followed, including outings with Roy’s sister, Marie, and her husband Doug.
Then Roy was posted to Aden for two years Sheila got what must have been a fascinating job as assistant to the local judge.
Later, Roy’s brother Jeff went to live with Roy and Sheila while he looked for a job in England.
After Roy left the RAF he joined IBM and they moved to Oxford, where Sally was born.
Following several more moves, they finally settled in Winchester although Roy's work then took them for lengthy periods to the United States and Italy, where they made some lifelong friends.
After Roy's retirement, they found new friends, too, in France thanks to their love of caravanning. They spent several weeks each year in Aubeterre and often headed for the warmth of Spain during the coldest winter months.
Sally married Steve in 1983 and they moved to Winchester, close to Sheila and Roy.
Grandchildren Carolyn and Kate came along in 1988 and 1990.
As Sally and Steve also went on their travels with work, Sheila and Roy visited them in both Scotland and North Carolina.
Sheila missed them very much and was glad to see them home again after four years abroad.
When they were young, Carolyn and Kate often popped up the road to see their grandparents. Sheila would feed them forbidden biscuits, and make homemade round chips, roast dinners and their favourite lumpy gravy.
She would write birthday and Christmas cards from her and Roy, adding her trademark funny little stick people – a round head with curly hair for herself, and a rectangular head for Roy.
Sheila's flair for chatty, amusing letter writing was famous within the family. Even if she didn't see her nieces and nephew more than couple of times a year they enjoyed receiving her newsy notes where the writing got smaller and smaller as the end of the last page approached and the final lines would continue round the very edges of the paper.
Her creative style transferred easily to the electronic medium of email thanks to many patient hours of instruction and assistance from her personal IT consultant...Steve.
It was always a delight to receive emails in at least three different fonts, occasional lapses into Bold, italics or capitals – accompanied by Sheila's comments such as ‘I don't know what happened there but I'm pressing on anyway.’
More seriously, Sheila was a talented painter in oils in a style reminiscent of the Impressionists. She and her friend and neighbour, Jill, enjoyed local art classes - as did Roy, who was also an enthusiastic artist.
Sheila gave many of her paintings away, and they now adorn the walls of homes across Europe.
Sheila and Roy also loved going out to the theatre and dinner dances and they were the hub of the family's social gatherings. Generations of children played in their lovely big garden while the adults enjoyed the wine and laughter on the patio on warm summer afternoons.
Carolyn and Kate would regularly call their Nan, whether to have a chat on the walk home from the station, or to tell her of some incident in their lives - whereupon she would give them the benefit of her advice.
Sally now finds herself imparting the same words of wisdom to them as her mother. Such as ‘Sit on your plant pot’ during hours of airport delays, and ‘Just keep going until your face fits’ when joining new social groups.
In later years, Sheila and her friend Joan went out regularly together shopping but no jaunt was complete without a chat, and a sherry or two, at Joan's.
Sheila also carried a mobile phone but sometimes with unintended consequences.
Carolyn recalls that at one time she thought she had a stalker because she kept getting wordless texts from an unknown number. It turned out to be her Nan, whose unlocked phone was repeatedly dialling Carolyn as it rattled around in her handbag!
As we all know, Roy suffered with Alzheimer’s disease during the last years of his life and Sheila looked after him tirelessly until he passed away peacefully in June 2014 just after a family party to celebrate his 90th birthday.
Sheila had a mild heart attack in June 2017, but was well enough to celebrate her 90th birthday in style with a family meal in a local hotel.
Carolyn was married in October 2017, and Sheila was able to get to know Carolyn’s husband, Neil, and welcome him into the family - although she was unable to attend the wedding itself.
Unaccustomed to ill health, Sheila became very unwell in the last few months of her life. Even so her death was unexpected when it came suddenly on 11th January 2018, the day Sally and Steve were due to bring her home from hospital.
One of the most heart-warming aspects of Sheila’s passing has been the sheer number of people who have either stopped Sally and Steve in the street or written to tell them how much they will miss her. She loved her family and friends, and they loved her.
Although she had reached her 90th birthday, she did not look or behave like someone of that age but she liked using her blue badge, which entitled anyone giving her a lift to park close to their destination on double yellow lines.
When she visited Jan and John to go to Cheltenham Literature Festival a couple of years ago she got out of the car in a no parking zone near the entrance and clearly felt she didn't look old or infirm enough to be a blue badge holder. She whispered to Jan ‘I'm just going to hold onto your arm and hobble a bit in case anyone thinks I'm cheating.’
Many people have expressed disbelief that she was even close to 90 years old.
She had fair hair, wore jeans, bright colourful necklaces and had a great sense of fun - and that's how we shall remember her.